waiting to asshale

 

"ASSHALE!" the assertive voice came from the other room. omg! how rude! {my mind raced: think, janean, think ~ urged the little voice inside my head ~ you're in a gym, for goodness sake...the woman couldn't possibly have just randomly shouted 'asshale' at a room full of people} timidly, i peeked around the corner into the small adjacent studio. some sort of a tai- chi-stretchy-bendy-pilates-yoga-type-warm-up group of men and women of various shapes and sizes, experiencing varying levels of ecstasy and agony, collectively released their breath in unison. ooooooooooh. well. that was very helpful. exhale. the woman shouted, "exhale!" what a relief! now i can peacefully go about my workout, resting assured there is not some sassy-boots-drill-seargeant in the other room, shouting big-meanie-names at a room full of unsuspecting people. and if by chance i should experience a moment of strain or fatigue ~ whether mid-cardio or toning-weights ~ one can only hope, that bean and cheese burrito i had for lunch with a side of chipotle shrimp...won't cause me to accidentally asshale!

~ janean christine mariani